Exiting the Abyss

It is now 4 full days and nights since my return from the city of Carlisle. Unfortunately the mental scars and psychological effects are very much evident. I have lost my appetite. I have become distant, confused, unfocused, de-motivated. I am slowly losing the will to live.

The day began in relaxed fashion. Bellies full after a fry up and cup of tea, we merrily set out for our first pre match ale. It was delightful. A few more jars in various establishments and we soon set off to Brunton Park, via an unsuccessful sleeping bag collection trip. Pre match atmosphere. Colourful, friendly, families, horns, flags, balloons, stuffed mascot foxes. Kick off. Rumours of favourable scorelines from other matches permeate the stadium. YES, DONCASTER HAVE BEEN PULLED LEVEL! IT DOESN'T MATTER, FOREST HAVE PULLED FURTHER AHEAD. Final whistle. Sadly Carlisle failed to gain the 3 points required, with a rotund Darren Anderton pulling the strings for Bournemouth in the midfield. In the end it would not have been enough anyway, with Forest winning elsewhere. Then the pitch invasion. Angry men, eager to salute their heroes one final time this season, voice their displeasure. Atmosphere begins to turn sour. Oh dear.

Pub. 6pm. Need to work quickly. Heavy elects for full bottles of wine (no messing about). The educated locals enter the fray, clad in Ben Sherman short sleeves. Ted Baker sweaters. The bars begin to fill up and the atmosphere adopts a sinister tone. Never mind - lets go for a Chinese and recharge our batteries/line our stomachs. THIS WAS A VERY GOOD MOVE IN HINDSIGHT. Our party is reduced to one Heavy and one Toad, so inevitably the quiz machine gets a feed. Thankfully we avoided any unsavoury incidents. And so to the end game. Heavy and Toad enter the Globe bar, popular with goths, students, Scousers and bikers. Did I mention the barman is a wife beater and apparently a high ranking member of the BNP? Perhaps not, but it would not surprise me. Drunken games of pool ensue, accompanied by unfortunate juke box choices. We Built this City on Rock and Roll.

3AM - chucking out time, Heavy and Toad wander ahead, get lost, respect the Queens Highway before slashing heavily in our friends back porch. Sleeping bag and wine collected from a mad Scousers living room. Heavy and Toad return to base, and set up camp in the sparsely decorated/furnished flat. Toad waits until Heavy is asleep then does the gentlemanly thing. He enters Heavies sleeping bag, removes his trousers.....retrieves the door keys from his pocket and heads out to Rouge :-) Sunday, although lethargic I am buoyed by a Liverpool victory and crawl to the train station an broken man. I love Carlisle.