The Sweet Silver Song of the Lark

This time last year, Liverpool fans were relishing the start of the 2010-2011 season. Rafa Benitez, after a miserable 2009-2010 season, had been removed and the club had a new idol to worship in the shape of Joe Cole who would bamboozle opposition defences alongside Steven Gerrard and Fernando Torres. Under the steadying influence of the hugely experienced Roy Hodgson, one of Europe's most respected coaches (who has managed such clubs as FC Malmo, Neuchatel Xamax and Grasshopper Zurich), Liverpool would surely reclaim their rightful place at the top table of English league football?

Sadly, things didn't quite go according to plan. The high point of last season for LFC was the eventual change in ownership following a bitter court battle. Its new owners, Fenway Sports Group, subsequently spent the remainder of the season positioning the club for a more serious challenge to the top-4 this season. The most important of these was the permanent appointment of Kenny Dalglish as manager, together with the recruitment of respected coach Steve Clarke.

FSG have followed up the January signings of Andy Carroll and the superb Luis Suarez with the highly promising Jordan Henderson, Charlie Adam and Stewart Downing. But will this be enough to close the gap on Manchester United, Chelsea, Man City and Arsenal? FSG's strategy of recruiting young talent with a high re-sale value is admirable, but most observers would agree that there remains a clear need for at least 2 or 3 more 'marquee' signings of technically gifted players in or nearing their prime. Indeed, there is an unmistakable feeling of frustration among many Liverpool fans, expressed through Twitter and message boards, that the club have seemingly missed out on quality players such as Juan Mata, Fabio Coentrau, Gervinho and Sergio Aguero. But were these players ever realistic? The truth is probably not. Some argued was that although Liverpool will not be involved in Europe, the lure of 'King Kenny' would be enough to attract the cream of Europe. This would obviously be the case for hardcore fans of LFC but almost certainly not for a young, ambitious footballer from the streets of Buenos Aires, Anyama or Provincia.

Downing is a solid signing who will certainly improve the delivery from wide areas. Henderson should also prove a shrewd investment given time, although he is likely to play only a limited role this coming season. Charlie Adam is harder to assess. On his day he is an accomplished passer and had an impressive first half of last season as Blackpool swaggered their way to the top half of the table. But his second half of the season tailed off badly as he ultimately captained the Seasiders to relegation. Adam scored 12 premier league goals last season - a fairly impressive haul. However, 8 of those were from the penalty spot and just 2 from open play. With these expensive signings on board, it will interesting to see how Dalglish sets up his first XI. I would guess that, with squad as it is, the back four will line up as Kelly-Carragher-Skrtel-Johnson. Midfield is tricky but is likely to consist of Kuyt-Gerrard-Lucas-Downing with Carroll and Suarez up front.

The unfortunate thing for Liverpool is that their likely main rivals (with the exception so far of Arsenal) have also invested heavily. It will not be easy to reclaim a top-4 finish. And should they fail, where does this leave Kenny Dalglish? Is he untouchable? The suspicion is that FSG were keen to appoint new Chelsea boss Andre Villas Boas, but the Kop's call for King Kenny made that impossible. Whilst I am cautiously optimistic of a good season, I am also far too familiar with that mid-October feeling of dejection to make any bolder claim than that.

Hodgson Injects Feel Good Factor

Following the most demoralising season in my lifetime as a Liverpool supporter, there is a strong sense of optimism currently surrounding Anfield ahead of the new season. Roy Hodgson may not have been every Liverpool fans first choice as manager, but he has started his tenureship in impressive style. The impression is that Hodgson is a 'hands on' manager and one whom players enjoy working with. And unlike Rafael Benitez he is open, honest, and on good terms with the media. He conducts himself with dignity and maturity, preferring not to answer questions in riddles or 'double speak'.

There is of course much work to be done to restore the club's pride after an embarrassing 2009-2010 season. Hodgson has moved quickly to shift much of the dead wood at the club including Degen, Aurelio, Itandje and Insua. One would hope the likes of Reira, Ngog, El Zhar, Plessis and Kyrgiakos will follow suit. Encouragingly, Hodgson has made it clear that he intends to inject a more British feel to the squad, remembering the new Premier League rules on home grown players. The recent signings of Jonjo Shelvy, Milan Jovanovic, Joe Cole and Danny Wilson together with Steven Gerrard's commitment to the club represents shrewd business and have given the fans reasons to look forward to the new season.

This was always going to be a crucial summer for Liverpool in terms of appointing the right manager, making the right changes to the playing staff and successfully selling the club to a suitable owner. The ownership issue in particular is an absolute priority and it is clear that the club can only really move forward once Hicks and Gillett have departed Merseyside. I have long since learned to avoid the wild optimism that used to dominate Liverpool's pre-season, but I can genuinely say that that I am already looking forward to our first game against Arsenal on 15th August.

Railway Investment Must Be Maintained

An efficient, reliable and quality transport infrastructure is one of the cornerstones of a civilised society and essential for economic growth. The recent pledge by Transport Secretary, Lord Adonis, to radically improve the most neglected major railway stations is a welcome sign of a commitment to investing in Britain's rail infrastructure. Adonis recently conducted a tour of the 10 major stations most in need of upgrading as identified in a report for the DfT. Importantly, it was stressed that this will involve not only more reliable timetables and newer trains, but more modern and comfortable stations. If the UK is to meet its ambitious carbon reduction targets, persuading people to switch from their car to the train will be crucial. Other European countries are already well ahead of the UK. In Spain, for example, the report notes that "high speed lines offer consistent world class travel from modern stations to modern trains and regenerated cities". Railway stations are vital transport interchanges, providing access to key retail centres and enabling urban regeneration.

The input of local communities, particularly where there is currently a lack of provision, should be actively encouraged by politicians and planners alike. The key point is that railway stations should not be planned in isolation, but should form part of an integrated strategy incorporating the street networks around the station. They should be pleasant spaces in which to wait, with adequate access to all forms of public convenience. This should form the basis of emerging local development plans, with the overall aim of allowing smaller stations to become safer centres of activity which people will be more inclined to use. Railway stations serve a much greater purpose than merely allowing commuters on and off trains. Amidst all the public sector spending cuts, this Goverment and the next must not forget the important role of the railway infrastructure in promoting sustainable economic growth.

Craig Murray reflects on the absurdity of the threat by RBS bankers to resign, unless they are given permission by the Government to award huge bonuses to their fee earning staff. It is scarely believable that they have the nerve to make such a request, at a time when 1,700 workers at the Corus steelmaking plant in Redcar are set to lose their jobs. The word 'talent' seems to be the buzzword throughout the banking industry. It is important, we are assured, that the banks retain their top talent so that they do not move on to other companies. What logic! Damn, why did I not think of that in my previous job? It's obvious isn't it? Bully your employer into raising your salary or you will bugger off to a competitor! Sheesh. What 'talent' is this exactly? Are these the same talented whizzkids who mismanaged our money and got us into this mess in the first place? Come to think of it, what do they actually produce? What is their product? And how is their talent any more valuable to society than that of a steelmaker. A steelmaker manufactures and produces something we can see, feel and touch.

As Murray points out, it would have taken an injection of 0.0003% of the amount injected into the financial sector to save the Corus plant. Sadly it is apparently not deemed valuable enough to society. So as the bankers, who will undoubtedly receive their bonus in the end, contemplate whether to upgrade to a Bugati Veyron or Ferrari 355, the Corus workers will be contemplating how to make future mortgage payments.

Rafa Clarifies Aquilani Position

Rafael Benitez has defended his curious non selection of Italian midfielder Alberto Aquilani. Koppites have been left baffled by Benitez's reluctance to field his £20 million summer signing, despite confirmations that he is "fit and ready to play". Following yesterdays drab 0-0 draw with Blackburn, the Spaniard responded to confused journalists by claiming that he is protecting Aquilani for his testimonial, which is scheduled for June 2019. Benitez claimed "Alberto is talented but fragile. In 2019 he will have been with us for 10 years and deserves his testimonial. It is important that we keep him fit for this very important game. We have other good players who can do a job in the meantime. I won't risk him."

Beginning of the end for Benitez

Liverpool's miserable season got even worse last night as they were eliminated from the Champions League, despite a 1-0 win over Hungarian champions Debrecen. Any faint hope they had of keeping their campaign alive was erased as Fiorentina survived a late fight back by Lyon to claim victory by the same scoreline. The Merseysiders have the consolation of entering the Europa League, but most fans will not have much of an appetite for that competition. In truth, Liverpool did not deserve to qualify for the knockout stages. Yes, they have endured a certain degree of misfortune, such as the last minute equaliser away to Lyon, but the fact remains they have underperformed badly. Even last nights game highlighted the problem. Lyon and Fiorentina comfortably despatched of Debrecen away from home with 4-0 and 4-3 wins respectively, whereas Benitez's side laboured their way through the game after taking the lead, seemingly content with a 1-0 win from as early as the 10 minute mark.

Amidst all the gloom, it is the omission of the clubs major summer signing Alberto Aquilani that is most baffling. In recent weeks, Benitez has repeatedly assured fans and journalists that the Italian is (and i quote) "fit and ready to play". The player himself seems champing at the bit to get out there and start his Liverpool career. From the early stages of last nights game it was obvious that the Hungarians were there for the taking. With Liverpool lacking flair and a creative influence, the game seemed ideal for the introduction of Aquilani, probably in place of one of their two holding midfield players. But Benitez, for whatever reason, resisted the temptation. Even the opportunity to help him build up some match sharpness in the last half hour was again squandered. We can only assume therefore that Aquilani does not figure in Benitez's first team plans. He may not be a saviour, but should at least be given the chance to show what he can do. As it happened, Debrecen predictably worked their way back into the game and almost snatched a draw in injury time, in much the same way Lyon did 3 weeks earlier.

Liverpool fans have been patient, more patient than almost any set of fans in world football I would suggest. We understand that long term success is not built overnight. In the last 3 months of last season there were signs that we had finally cracked it. We attacked teams from the first whistle, battering them with flair, imagination, pace and creativity. The defeats of Real Madrid, Manchester United and Aston Villa spring to mind. It was as if the shackles were off. And therein lies the problem. It seems that under Benitez, Liverpool can only play to their full potential when the pressure is off, that is when they are out of every major competition. When there is still something at stake, such as the league title, the Spaniard's natural instinct is overwhelmingly caution. He is a manager who seems to have absolute, total faith in statistics, graphs, charts and percentages. If his sheet of pro zone stats indicate that the game is not suitable for the introduction of Aquilani, then Benitez will abide by that. In other words, he lacks the fundamental managerial instinct to assess a game with his own eyes and make human, footballing decisions.

The phone-ins and message boards will be calling for Benitez to go, but now would not be the right time. If the club are to sack Benitez, they would need a suitable replacement. Jose Mourinho will inevitably be linked, but is currently in charge of Inter Milan, and more significantly, on a huge salary. Guus Hiddink will also be suggested, especially following Russia's failure to qualify for the World Cup. The Dutchman though has indicated that he is keen to remain in Moscow for the next European campaign, and also retains an association with Chelsea. Current Galatasaray boss Frank Rijkaard would also feature in the betting, although doubts remain as to his experience and tactical nous. No doubt names such as O'Neill, Hitzfeld, Dalglish, Klinsmann and Lippi will be mentioned. Should England win the World Cup next summer, Fabio Capello may even be touted. Whatever happens, I believe that any decision should be left until the end of the season.

Patience with Rafael Benitez is almost at and end with most Liverpool supporters. Defeat against Everton on Sunday is almost unthinkable, but with this Liverpool side it is sadly a very real prospect. The priority now MUST be on finishing in the top 4 of the Premier League. Personally, I do not give two hoots about the Europa League, and would be content for a reserve side to be fielded as in the Carling Cup. The FA Cup may provide a crumb of comfort, but if they can keep Torres fit, and finally introduce Aquilani, call me mad but I believe that there is a chance of catching an inconsistent Arsenal side and finishing 3rd. If you were to offer Liverpool fans the FA Cup and a 3rd place finish right now I'm sure most would snatch your hand off.

Glasgow North East By-Election

Residents of the Glasgow North East constituency will finally get the chance to elect their new Member of Parliament tomorrow following the departure of ex-speaker Michael Martin to the House of Lords. The seat will almost certainly go to Labour candidate William Bain, although the SNP are likely to make some gain. Socialist firebrand Tommy Sheridan, who is definitely not a swinger, has used the election campaign to spread his rhetoric but is unlikely to make any significant dent at the polling stations.

Threethousandversts has already noted the decidedly poor quality of candidates, including "straight talking" Big Brother runner up Mikey Hughes who has vowed to "clean up the House" (literally i presume?) and Glasgow Airport baggage handler John Smeaton. Smeaton, who has squeezed every last morsel of publicity out of his status as Glasgow Airport's terrorist attack 'hero', appears ever so slightly out of his depth in the political arena, something which STV Political Editor Bernard Ponsonby seems well aware of. Glasgow North East is one of the UK's most deprived constituencies with high unemployment and a depressingly low life expectancy. It may be mildly amusing to witness Smeaton's embarrassing performance, but this constituency deserves a higher quality of candidates.

Glasgow Betrayed By SNP Again

We are all familiar with the SNP's broken promises by now: no scrapping of Council Tax; no reduction of primary school class sizes; no writing off student debt; no 1000 extra police officers; no protection for A&E units; no grant for first time house buyers etc.

Now we can add to that list a complete reversal of their commitment to invest in public transport provision, particularly in the west of Scotland. Finance Secretary John Swinney's recent decision to axe the Glasgow Airport Rail Link (GARL) is another blow for Scotland's largest city, and yet more evidence of an Edinburgh biase from the Nationalists. After expressing his anger at the decision, the leader of Glasgow City Council Steven Purcell (Lab), was apparently told to "behave like a grown up" by the First Minister. Charming, but perhaps not out of character for Salmond.

The rail link has long been considered a vital compotent of modernising the west of Scotland's ageing transport network and injecting a huge boost to the wider economy. The scheme would have safeguarded thousands of jobs in engineering, planning, construction and environmental monitoring, as well as supporting the city's growing business tourism and conference destination reputation. 95% of users travel to Glasgow airport by road, with the only other option of getting into the city centre an expensive taxi or bus. Numbers through the airport are predicted to double by 2030, and with the Commonwealth Games in 2014, this was the perfect opportunity to at last improve travel choice and provide a modern, efficient and long term solution to infrastructure problems in the west of Scotland.

Laughably, Swinney has attempted to ease concerns by committing to a 'Fastlink' system, which is simply another term for an extra bus lane. It is quite depressing that, despite all the evidence from other European cities, successive administrations still cannot acknowledge the importance of an efficient, integrated transport infrastructure to the economic success of a region. Let's hope that the other main parties pledge their commitment to reinstating GARL and that this wretched party are removed from power at the next opportunity.

The Casino Always Wins

In his final 'Event' on Channel 4 last night, Derren Brown narrowly failed to win £175,000 with £5,000 of stolen money at a roulette table in an unspecified casino somewhere in Europe. Or did he? The illusionist claimed to be able to predict which number the ball would land on by simultaneously working out the speed of the roulette wheel and the ball itself. He failed by one number. Leading up to the casino event, Brown explained which skills he would be employing through a series of stunts. In the first he selected two members of the audience, one extrovert and one introvert, and asked them to choose from one of two boxes, one of which contained £20. The purpose was to demonstrate that the extrovert could 'will' the £20 towards himself simply by adopting a positive attitude. As any amateur magician will know, this is one of the most basic of tricks. Prior to putting the money in the box he wrote an instruction to hand the note over to the other contestant. This is a fail safe mechansim. As it turned out the introvert chose the correct box and Brown instructed her to reveal the message. If the extrovert had chosen it, he would simply have neglected to mention the message written on the note.

In his next stunt he claimed to be able to guess the speed of a fast moving vehicle by employing some form of advanced trigonometry using surrounding signposts and trees to work out the relative speed of any given vehicle. Not only this, he then apparently guessed the correct speed purely by listening to the sound of the vehicle engine! Clearly this is absolute nonsense. In the next experiment, he demonstrated an ability to analyse the speed and trajectory of a small rubber ball thrown randomly inside a squash court, and predict exactly where it would finally settle within the court. Again, absolutely absurd. The idea was to generate in the viewer a sense that Brown could quite conceivably predict the speed of a roulette wheel and ball using these same skills, and subsequently cheat the casino.

Of course, the legal ramifications (for Brown and Channel 4) of conning a member of the public into handing over £5000 through hypnosis and then gambling that money in a foreign casino using supposedly underhand methods are fairly significant. All of which suggests that the whole thing, as with his previous 'Events', was almost certainly a hoax. It may have been that Brown really did hypnotise a member of the public into handing over £5000. But he probably did not travel to a casino in Europe. It was most likely a mock up of a casino in a London warehouse/studio, and the £5,000 was therefore never at risk. Essentially, Brown was in a no-lose situation. If he DID get it right, then it would have been further evidence of his amazing psychic abilities. However, by narrowly missing out, he showed that he is in fact fallible, thus preserving his enigma and a thirst for yet more events (and crucially another TV series!). Nevertheless, Brown is undoubtedly a great showman and it makes for entertaining television. Such hyped up shows are ideal vehicles for advertisers and a further platform for Brown to raise his profile and set himself up for a big money book deal.

Hollyoaks Babe in Boyfriend Sensation

The Sun today carries the world exclusive that Hollyoaks actress Jennifer Metcalfe has got a new boyfriend, having been pictured together in Spain. Eye witness accounts have confirmed that Metcalfe, 26, at one point picked up her handbag. Having surveyed the water, the glamorous brunette is also said to have purchased a cocktail from a nearby bar. Sources indicate that it was a 'Cosmopolitan', although these reports are unconfirmed. The sand on which Metcalfe was walking is likely to be of the volcanic variety, with scientists currently carrying out forensic tests to establish its consistency and any traces of nail varnish. British holidaymaker Kandi Topper, 23, from Essex described the events: "It was incredible...i just saw her drinking a cocktail and walking along the beach. At one point she kissed her boyfriend on the cheek - I think it was the left cheek, but it could have been the right one...I'm not sure".

Liverpool Need to Step Up a Gear

Liverpool travel to West Ham today in the knowledge that there is little room for error, having already suffered two early season defeats in the league. The Hammers are an unpredictable outfit, although Upton Park has been a happy hunting ground for the Reds in recent seasons. With Chelsea having established a slight lead (albeit having played inferior opposition) it is important that Liverpool carry on the momentum from their previous two games against Bolton and Burnley, before the crunch match with Ancelotti's men in a few weeks.

Wednesday's performance against Debrecen was far from inspiring, with Gerrard worryingly out of sorts, and Benitez's side received a fair amount of media criticism for their narrow 1-0 win. In general it was interpreted as further evidence that Liverpool are a long way off challenging for the title (almost universally explained by the absence of Xabi Alonso). In contrast, Manchester United's victory by the same scoreline against Besiktas was described as 'gritty' and 'professional' i.e further evidence that they are a team who know how to win when not playing at their best. Perhaps it is just that I am paranoid, or maybe it was because they were playing in front of a larger terrestrial audience, but there does seem to be a prevailing trend within the world of football journalism whereby Liverpool are open to harsher judgement than their main rivals. Yes, it was a poor performance on Wednesday, but let's not over-react. It is still very early in the season. I'll stick my neck out and say that in the long term, Manchester United will miss Ronaldo more than Liverpool will miss Alonso.

David Mitchell's Soapbox: Waste

David Mitchell's Soapbox: Waste

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Over the past 24 weeks, the comedian David Mitchell has presented a series of observations on a range of random issues. They are essentially 4 minute rants delivered in the familiar Peep Show sarcasm mould. I'd recommend you have a look at his others via the above link.

Lockerbie Families Deserve Inquiry

It's not often that Hernandez dips his fingers into the bowl of world politics, but the release of Abdelbaset Ali al-Megrahi on compassionate grounds today merits consideration. The move has caused widespread anger, most notably in the US with President Obama describing it as a "mistake". On the face of it their anger is perhaps understandable. Megrahi was convicted in 2001 for the murder of 270 people of which 189 were American. He was sentenced to 27 years yet has served just 8, having lost an appeal in 2002. Aside from the arguments for his release, the Scottish Government's handling of the affair has been utterly shambolic. Justice Minister Kenny MacAskill's bizarre decision to visit Megrahi in Greenock prison earlier this month has fuelled specualtion of a deal preserving diplomatic relations with Libya. And today, the SNP have predictably attempted to use the worldwide exposure as a nationalistic points-scoring exercise, clearly a reminder that Scotland now makes its own decisions and is a separate entity from the UK.

The delivery of MacAskill's statement at todays press conference also had a rather odd tone, almost 'sermon' like as noticed by the BBC Scotland political editor Brian Taylor. It is reasonable to assume that the tone was for the benefit of the US audience, particularly the reference to a "higher authority". Apart from airy references to Scottish morals, values and beliefs, the statement lacked any real justification or reasoning, perhaps a hint that there were in fact diplomatic motives behind the release. Despite MacAskill's assurances, it seems unlikely that his release was motivated purely by 'compassion' or 'mercy'. Can we assume that from now on any prisoner with a terminal illness will be released and allowed to return to his family?

There is growing suspicion (in Scotland at least) that Megrahi's original trial may have been flawed and that his conviction may be unsafe. Many believe, including some of the families themselves, that Megrahi has been made a convenient scapegoat. Tam Dalyell, the former father of the House of Commons, has persistently argued Megrahi's innocence, saying that:

"Mr McAskill has arrived at the right decision on compassionate grounds. I do not accept his endorsement of the guilt of Mr Megrahi, whom I continue to believe had nothing whatsoever to do with the crime of Lockerbie".

Tellingly, back in 2007 the Scottish Criminal Cases Review Commission recommended that Megrahi be granted a second appeal, suggesting that the full facts did not come out through the original trial. It does seem unlikely that Megrahi could have acted alone and organised the bombing without significant support, if indeed he was involved at all.

Whether he was responsible for the atrocity or not, Megrahi has only months to live. It appears that he has sacrificed any chance of clearing his name in order to spend his remaining time with his family. For the sake of the Scottish legal system, it is essential that a full public inquiry is held into the case. Otherwise the real tragedy will be that the victims families will be denied closure, as reflected in the words of Jim Swire who lost his daughter Flora in the bombing:

""I think for those of us who have looked carefully at the evidence and have doubts, we cannot achieve that until we're quite sure that it really is true and it could be proved that it were true that he was the one that did it. It's no good trying to have closure on false foundations"

Big Season Ahead at Anfield

Liverpool came agonisingly close to clinching the Premier League last season, and it was only Manchester United's superior depth of squad that won it in the end. Glen Johnson remains the only new arrival at Anfield this close season, and further additions will be needed if Liverpool are to realistically compete for the title again this season. There is still a feeling that the side is over reliant on Fernando Torres and Steven Gerrard for goals, so a top class striker should certainly head Benitez's priorities. I would put forward Eidur Gudjohnen as a potentially useful addition. The ex-Chelsea man is an intelligent forward who could in theory provide an ideal foil for Torres. He is currently struggling to command a regular berth in the Barcelona team and a move could suit all parties - and is likely to come relatively cheap as well. However David Villa remains the most sought after striker in Europe, and Fernando Torres has made no secret of his wish to line up alongside his international striking partner at Anfield. Villa would not come cheap, but the estimated £30m generated from the sale of Xabi Alonso, together with the unspent part of the current budget, could provide the funds needed. Alonso will be a big loss, but Liverpool will not suddenly slide into mid table obscurity as a result of his departure. Alonso is undoubtedly a class act - arguably the finest passer in Europe - but he can be replaced. It is comforting to remember that Liverpool's best result of last season - the 4-1 drubbing of Manchester United at Old Trafford - was achieved without Alonso. Rumours have focused on the Roma midfielder Aquilani as a replacement, although admittedly I know next to nothing about him. For my money Mascherano would be a more serious loss to Liverpool than Alonso, so it is pleasing to hear of reports that Barcelona have cooled their interest in the Argentinian. I also believe Benitez needs to strengthen the centre back position, and he could do worse than Fulham's giant Norwegian Brede Hangeland.

Apart from further signings, I would like to see some of the younger players step up to the plate this season. In particular, Emiliano Insua looks a reall prospect in the full back position, and should provide healthy competition for Glen Johnson and Fabio Aurelio. Martin Kelly is highly rated at Melwood and this could be a big season for the England U-19 international. He could be the long term successor to Jamie Carragher. In midfield, local lad Jay Spearing is a fiesty competitor with a touch of the Steve McMahon about him and who impressed when he was given the opportunity last season. Up front it could be the right time to blood Daniel Pacheco and Kristiaz Nemeth. I remember watching Pacheco last pre season and even then he was obviously a class act - fantastic technique and a neat finisher, albeit a little raw. Nemeth looks a special player and has been on the fringes of the first team squad for some time, but was badly hampered by injury problems last season. Benitez obviously knows better than I do as to when the time is right for them, but if Alex Ferguson is prepared to give the likes of Macheda and Welbeck an opportunity in big games, I see no reason why Nemeth and Pacheco shouldn't.

The Russian Experience

One my long standing travelling ambitions is to do the Trans-Siberian Express railway journey from St Petersburg to Vladivostok. From the Guardian website, Marcel Theroux (the big brother of Louis) provides an interesting flavour of what long distance locomotive travelling in Russia might entail. With regard to the young Russian couple in the first part, you'd be quite right in thinking 'HOW THE HELL DID HE GET HER?!'

IMPORTANT SETANTA UPDATE

Setanta are no longer trading in Great Britain. We are unable to answer any of your stupid enquiries. Please bugger off and leave us alone.

PS: You are not getting any of your money back.

Setanta Sent for Early Bath

Although I have not registered my thoughts on Setanta through any form of recordable medium, I am proud to announce that I called their demise some time ago. From its inception, the Southern Irish broadcaster has adopted a bullish and aggressive marketing strategy. In one of their earlier advertising campaigns, I can clearly recall how they proudly announced that "only Setanta, not Sky" possessed the British broadcasting rights to show the USPGA golf tournament. Err, really? No offence to the USPGA, but even if it was on terrestrial TV I probably wouldn't bother with it, never mind Sky. And this has proved a feature of their existence - they have attempted to muscle their way into a market which just doesn't exist in the long term. Rangers against Celtic is one thing, but who the hell cares about Falkirk versus Hibernian other than the few supporters of those clubs? In the Premier League, Setanta only had the rights to the lower band games i.e. not involving any of the so called big four, whose games Sky have the rights to. Realistically, the only games worth spending big on are those involving Rangers, Celtic, Liverpool, Man Utd, Chelsea and Arsenal. Any games not involving those clubs are quite frankly unprofitable and should be left to the terrestrial stations.

It is the general air of desperation and dishonesty about Setanta's tactics that bothers me. I know many people who have had great difficulty in cancelling their subscription, one of whom was forced to call their 'customer service' department on no less than 6 occassions, mainly due to the fact that the "disconnection documents" (whatever they are) were apparently sent to the wrong address not once but twice.  The straw that broke the camels back, however, was surely their decision not to sell on the broadcasting rights for the highlights of a crucial Croatia v England World Cup qualifier to a terrestrial broadcaster. This was generally perceived as a public relations disaster and probably did more than anything to convince potential subscribers (who were by now making household spending cuts due to the recession) that Sky was the safer and better option given the choice between the two.

Perhaps the most surprising aspect of this sorry episode is that bodies such as the SPL, Premier League and Football Association have apparently been willing to put so much faith in these cowboys, despite the lessons of the ITV Digital disaster. I for one am delighted that this appears to be the end of the road for Setanta, although sadly the many football clubs who rely on their television payments will not feel the same. The rumour in Scotland is that ESPN, the global sports network owned by the Disney Corporation, could acquire the unpaid broadcasting rights for the SPL. If so, it may be only a matter of weeks before we see Rangers and Celtic fighting in out in the Mickey Mouse League - quite literally!

Broadfoot Left With Egg On His Face

Rangers star Kirk Broadfoot may miss Rangers' crucial final 2 games of the season, not because of a groin strain, tight hamstring or any other normal footballers injury, but because of an exploding egg! The rugged defender, 24, was left with severe burns to his face after an egg he was poaching in the microwave exploded.  Broadfoot was apparently showered with boiling water, shattered glass and hot egg when he removed the bowl from the microwave. Reports suggest that the quick thinking Ayrshire man immediately plunged his face under the cold water tap to relieve the painful burns. 

Broadfoot is not alone in suffering an egg related injury. The Royal Society for the Prevention of Accidents says that 500 Britons a years are admitted to hospital after "egg related incidents". They have used Broadfoot's case to highlight the importance of taking extra care when dealing with boiling water in a microwave. Broadfoot is expected to make a full recovery from his scalds, but perhaps next time he should follow my fail safe poached egg recipe from Down and Out which involves no microwaves.

Expenses Row - Time to Move On?

I must admit the MP's expense controversy is really beginning to get on my breasts. It has been the main news item for the past 5 or 6 days which I find quite extraordinary. Obviously there are weaknesses in the system which need to be rectified. Is it really that shocking to hear that politicians have been up to some dodgy antics? Let's leave it for an independent body, agreed by all parties, to come up with some recommendations and we can all have a discussion about it. Agreed? Right, let's move on and have some REAL news.

Carlisle Staring Relegation In The Face

Carlisle United enter the final round of fixtures this Saturday knowing that failure to pick up 3 points will see them relegated to the 4th tier of English League football. Their opponents are Millwall, a side who will be equally eager for the win that may provide them with an easier two games in the Play-Offs (against either Scunthorpe or Tranmere - who face each other- rather than Leeds United).

It is a sorry tale for the Cumbrians following last seasons narrow failure to win automatic promotion to the Championship on the last day. Worryingly, their fate is not in their own hands. Even a win may not be enough, should Brighton win at home to Stockport and Northampton pick up a point at Leeds. The scenario mirrors the final day of the 1999 season when on-loan goalkeeper Jimmy Glass converted a dramatic injury time winner against Plymouth, sparking wild scenes of celebration and euphoria on the Brunton Park pitch. For Carlisle's loyal band of followers that will be nothing more than a distant memory if they fail to beat the Lions on Saturday afternoon. I for one will be keeping a very keen eye on proceedings.